New York Lullabies
by SwingFromTheChandelier
Summary: Santana is in NY with the gang but Brittany didn't go to their high school. AU how they meet. "My heart started racing and adrenaline was coursing through my veins. Another scream rippled through the cold night air. I slowly crept up to the alley that was several feet away. When I peeked around the corner I quickly took in the sight and retreated my gaze." M for later chapters.
1. Summertime Sadness

Hello all,

There's plenty more where this came from, so please follow and I'll update soon. Enjoy!

**Chapter 1: Summertime Sadness**

I adapted to the nighttime noises of New York City rather quickly. After a couple of weeks the busy melodies actually became soothing and now lull me to sleep. That is of course if Rachel isn't practicing an annoyingly loud show tune in her bedroom at some odd hour of the night.

Lately she's been waking up at three in the morning to rehearse because she says that's when her voice sounds naturally raspy. She'll never admit it, but I know she envies me. These makeshift curtain doors have got to get replaced; especially since Blaine and Kurt have been getting their mack on every other weekend.

Every time I pay a visit to the landlord's office his wandering eyes make it apparent that he's not even listening. I thought that wearing a tight dress and stilettos would help make my request a top priority. I'm finding that in the Big Apple, good looks aren't getting me as far as they did in Lima. The competition here is fierce and yet I still can't land me a smoking hot girlfriend.

I keep falling for straight girls that are brainwashed by Katy Perry. They only enjoy the temporary thrill of being with a girl because ultimately they crave a white picket fence life with the prince charming husband. I don't even bother meeting girls at bars or clubs anymore. I'm kind of over being told they don't care. So there.

A few weeks ago I finally mustered up enough courage to ask out my favorite Starbucks barista. She managed to turn me into a morning person with her million dollar smile alone. After I asked her out she flashed me that heart melting smile and said yes. I had to stop myself from fist pumping, and I hate fist pumping. We exchanged phone numbers and had an amazing date a few days later. Her name was Emma.

We were flirting all night and had such good chemistry. She was also wearing heels that made her legs look amazing. I just couldn't help myself, so I invited her back to my place. It was fun, but something didn't feel right. The next morning I asked her if she wanted to get some breakfast with me.

She cocked her head to the side, gave me a sympathetic look and said "Ohh I'm sorry. This was just a one time thing for me. You get it, right?"

Yeah, I got it. All too well. Suddenly memories of Quinn came flooding back to me. We never spoke again after that experience. The thing is, I'm not sure if it was circumstantial or if we just drifted apart.

I decided to challenge it this time.

"No. I really don't get it. Please, elaborate," I said a little too harshly.

"I think I should go," she replied. She started dressing herself and I averted my eyes.

"So that's just it, Emma? We had an amazing time and you just used me? If all you wanted was to fuck me you could have at least told me before I spent a night's worth of tips on you."

She stared at me until I made eye contact with her. Her expression turned into one of pity. She half smirked and calmly replied "that's just how it goes sometimes," and walked out.

I had never felt so broken. I'm exhausted. I'm done trying.

I think I might be more upset that I now have to walk an extra three blocks to get a coffee. I still haven't had one that compares to hers. Fuck Emma. No, don't fuck Emma. That's what got me into that mess.

I feel a slight pain in my chest. The feeling of loneliness usually sets in around this time, when I want to get my snuggle on. Spooning my body pillow tonight will not suffice. I swiped the screen to unlock my phone and read that it's 1:03A.M. I clicked on the Facebook icon and scrolled through my news feed. After looking at several pictures of happy couples, one engagement, and a newborn baby, I let out a heavy sigh and placed my phone back on the wooden nightstand.

I try to remind myself that people aren't actually as happy in real life as they appear to be on Facebook. Everyone puts up their best pictures and gloats about how amazing their lives are. Or complains about it, depending on their use of the site as a public diary instead of a bragfest. The theory doesn't reassure me. It actually just depresses me more.

I suddenly have the intense desire to smoke a cigarette. I picked up the bad habit while waiting tables. I know I shouldn't, but coworkers continued to offer me one when I was stressed out. Table 23 tried to feel up my leg, table 31 sent their steak back twice for not being cooked enough, and I just couldn't take it anymore.

I regret the way I treated servers when I was in high school. The last time I was in Lima, I went to Breadstix to apologize to the waitress I tormented countless times, but she had recently quit. I hope she moved on to bigger and better things.

I peeled off my covers and stood up in nothing but black lace underwear and a tank top. I opened up my dresser and put on a pair of pink sweatpants so that I could smoke on my fire escape.

I retrieved the box of Marlboro's from my large leather purse and opened it up only to realize that I had already smoked my last cigarette on my way home from work tonight. It figures. I guess a stroll down the street to the convenience store might help me clear my head anyhow.

I slung my heavy purse over my shoulder and slipped on some sandals. I grabbed my leather jacket too just in case it was a chilly summer night. When I stepped outside I inwardly thanked myself for being prepared at all times and put on my jacket.

It didn't take me very long to get to the 24 hour EZ Mart. As I pulled the door open I noticed that someone was about to leave so I held the door open for them. She looked up at me and smiled wide while saying "thank you."

Her hair was flowing and golden. Her eyes were as blue as the sky. She was absolutely beautiful. I couldn't help but give her a goofy smile in return. Before I had a chance to say anything further, she disappeared around the corner. And just like that, she was gone. I shook the thoughts from my head and remembered the task at hand.

I walked in and quickly scanned the store for any other patrons. I constantly feel like I'm on the defense and always need to be aware of my surroundings. Stranger danger. I relaxed my shoulders and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. It was just me and the man with the thick beard and red rimmed eyes.

I walked up to him and before I could open my mouth he instantly turned around and placed my favorite box of cigarettes on the counter.

"That'll be $9.59," he said.

"Wow, you're just full of charisma tonight. Aren't you going to at least lecture me about how I shouldn't be starting this habit?" I retorted.

He maintained eye contact with me and blinked a few times. He had no intention of saying anything further.

"Aren't you going to tell me about how this will ruin my pretty face by yellowing my teeth and causing wrinkles to form?"

No response. Not even the convenience store cashier gives a shit about me. He seems to only care just enough to remember my usual order. I slapped a ten dollar bill on the counter.

"Keep the change you filthy animal."

"I take offense to that."

"It's a reference. Home Alone. Ever seen it?"

He looked blankly at me and I shook my head. The bell that rang out when I opened the door was a cue for the light bulb going off in my head. I suddenly realized how desperate I was for any attention at all.

I slid out the first cigarette and flicked my zebra print lighter. I had to cover my mouth with my hand and try again because the wind had picked up. The nicotine instantly reached my lungs and I felt the familiar buzz in my head. My eyes fluttered closed and I leaned up against the wall for a moment. I puffed on the cancer stick several times and felt instant relief.

This was exactly what I needed and I may have cleared my thoughts enough to fall asleep. I started to head back to my apartment with my chin up and a slight smirk on my face, enjoying my head high. I started to comically swing my arms until I heard a blood curdling scream that stopped me in my tracks.

My heart started racing and adrenaline was coursing through my veins. Another scream rippled through the cold night air. I slowly crept up to the alley that was several feet away. When I peeked around the corner I quickly took in the sight and retreated my gaze.

A blonde girl was on her knees with a burly man standing behind her and holding her hands back. Another man was standing in front of her and was in the process of taking off the bandana from his head and tying it around her mouth. He was so short that he was eye level with her.

I stole another quick glance, but this time the shorter man was screaming at the girl and commanding her to shut up. When her muffled scream was attempted, he cracked her jaw with his fist and then quickly connected again right below her eye.

My heart broke at this sight and I knew what I had to do, but risk my life for a girl I didn't know? That was just crazy. I didn't have time to mull it over any longer, hoping that the element of surprise would work in my favor.

I rounded the corner and as I crept up on the scene, the blonde had fallen to the ground, earning a hard kick to the ribs from the taller man.

I pulled out the pepper spray from my purse and prepared it for use. As if I had been practicing this for weeks, I kicked the shorter man in the groin from behind while spraying the taller man in the face.

I knew I didn't have much time so I grabbed the girl by her arm a little too aggressively and tried to pull her up. She resisted.

"I'm trying to help you. Please come with me!" I said to her as calmly and sternly as possible.

That's when she looked up at me and I realized she was the girl coming out of the convenience store. Her eyes were a duller shade of blue and wide with terror. I pleaded with mine and she seemed to finally understand what was going on.

The men on the ground were starting to recover and she let me help her stand up.

"Can you walk?" I asked her.

She nodded and held one hand to her ribs while the other one hooked around my shoulder for support.

We started a quick pace towards the flickering street lights.

"My place is only a few blocks away. We can go there for safety and call the police," I suggested.

She looked at me wearily. "Do you have a better plan?" I asked.

She closed her eyes and shook her head. This girl was so fragile.

When we arrived at the front of my apartment building I shakily took out my keys and opened the door, letting her in first. I was still hopped up from the nicotine and adrenaline. When she stepped inside she instantly wrapped her arms around herself and studied the ground. I shut the door behind me and decided I should try introducing myself.

"Hey, you're safe now. I'm Santana." I awkwardly stuck my hand out.

She continued to train her eyes to the floor and shuffled her feet. "I'm Br...Brittany."

She didn't even notice my hand hanging there, so I lifted it up to her chin. She still couldn't look at me. I eyed the gashes and bruises forming on her face and grimaced.

"Brittany, do you want to go up to my apartment and clean these cuts?" I tried.

She slowly nodded in my direction. This seemed to currently be her only way of communicating.


	2. Sheila Take a Bow

**Chapter 2**

**Sheila Take a Bow**

We walked up three flights of stairs and I unlocked the door to my apartment. I opened it as quietly as I could, which was impossible since it was a giant hunk of metal. I gestured for her to lead the way and shut it behind us. I took a moment to collect myself and let out a heavy breath towards the door.

When I spun around I saw that Brittany was still trembling and her stature was similar to the one in the lobby, which will now be burned into my memory forever. I slowly approached her and draped my jacket over her shoulders. She thanked me with her eyes and began chewing on her lip.

"Come with me," I motioned and offered my hand. She hesitated and linked our pinkies instead. Normally this would have struck me as odd behavior, but tonight nothing could phase me. Not wanting to wake my roommates, I tiptoed and led her to my bedroom.

When we arrived I turned around to face her. "Brittany, do you want to call the police?"

Her eyes went wide and she locked them with mine. She looked so desperate and began to shake her head vigorously back and forth.

I instinctively reached my hand up to her cheek to still her movements but she winced and jerked her head back.

"Can you please let me help you? If we're not going to call the police I at least need to get you cleaned up," I said so softly that I was practically whispering.

Her body physically relaxed at my words. I took that as an opportunity to try again and reached my hand up. This time she allowed my fingers to ghost over the bruises that were forming on her face. Her eyes fluttered closed and she let out a long breath.

"Why don't you head to the bathroom and I'll be right back," I offered as I pointed my finger in the direction of the small black and red room attached to my bedroom.

She sauntered away and I turned on my heel. I retrieved a glass of water and hastily returned to the room. The toilet cover was down and she was sitting on top of it with her head buried in her hands. Her body started to convulse but no sounds came out.

I quickly opened the medicine cabinet and collected the supplies I needed. I knelt down in front of her and comfortingly placed my hand on her knee. I rubbed soothing circle patterns until she opened her eyes and looked at me. Her cheeks were glistening with tears and swirling together with the blood on her face. That must sting, I thought to myself.

"Here, this will help with the pain for now. You'll probably need even more tomorrow," I said as I offered the glass of water and three aspirin. She took them in one gulp. I'm not sure why she was so trusting of me, but I'm glad she was letting me help. She was my responsibility now.

I ran hot water under several washcloths and returned to my position. I lifted her chin up to inspect the wounds and began dabbing the excess blood. I could feel her eyes on me and I was nervous to meet them. I felt like I was crossing boundaries.

"You saved me," she stated in a monotone voice.

I continued cleaning her face and a small smirk formed on mine. "Ah, so you do speak English. I was getting worried there for a second."

She wasn't amused and her lip began to quiver. "Why are you helping me?" she asked.

Her eyes were still watching me and I connected the gaze. All of the worry was gone from them but instead was replaced by a thousand mile stare. They were expressionless. My heart broke and I felt strongly connected to this girl that I barely knew.

I tried to come up with a clever or supportive response. Something to help her feel okay about being in a stranger's bathroom in an extremely vulnerable state. I opened my mouth and shut it a few times. For once, I was at a loss for words.

Realizing I began to look like a dying fish, I shrugged and simply said "because you're letting me."

I tucked some stray hairs behind her ear and I studied her features. She was even more beautiful at a closer distance. I noticed all of her freckles and the cute indent in her bottom lip. She saw that I was staring and turned away.

"I still don't understand why you're being so nice. I mean, you could have just left me there. I deserved it anyhow. Instead you risked your life for me, and I'm a nobody..." she rambled in one breath and started to cry again.

I felt so helpless and didn't know what to say to make her feel better.

"I did it because I wanted to. I couldn't just stand there and watch two guys gang up on a beautiful girl."

She looked up at me and I gave her a worried look. Before I could even process what was happening she was lunging towards me and connecting our lips.

I barely returned the kiss before gently pushing her away. I took a moment to breathe and my lips were tingling.

She started crying again. "I'm sorry. That was so inappropriate. I just needed to feel something. Anything," she mumbled.

"It's okay. You just really caught me off guard, but please don't cry. You didn't do anything wrong. Brittany, where do you live? Do you want me to take you home?"

She shook her head. "I can't go back there."

"Okay. Do you have a friend I could call or a family member?"

"No, my family is in California. I don't have any friends here. Please don't make me go back to my apartment."

"Okay, then do you want to stay here?" I asked.

She started fidgeting and wringing her hands together until they started to turn red. I inserted my hands between them to prevent the self harm.

"No. I don't want to impose. I can probably just get a hotel room down the street or something."

"Please? I insist. It's really late. I have clothes you could borrow and plenty of space."

She nodded and simply said "okay."

I quickly put my hair up in a messy bun and gathered my thoughts.

"I'll get you a change of clothes. Do you want to take a bath?" I asked. I had a feeling that based on her previous comment she wasn't going to seek out something she needed unless I offered it.

She nodded. "Yeah. Um—if...if that's okay, of course?"

I smiled in her direction and turned the spout on for her. When I left the bathroom I heard the door quietly shut behind me. I walked over to my dresser and looked up into the mirror. I looked terrible. I had bags under my eyes, a wrinkle of worry in between my eyebrows, and I was as white as a ghost. I was desperately in need of sleep, but I had a feeling I wouldn't be getting any tonight.

I meandered into the kitchen. My body felt like it was on auto pilot and I began to brew a very strong pot of coffee. As the machine began to sputter I let my thoughts wander.

Why was Brittany so against reporting the incident and afraid of her apartment? Maybe I should have been stern because she was just afraid of reliving the events. Should I call them now? No, I just earned her trust.

The coffee pot hissed at me and I was shaken from my thoughts. Suddenly, a chill went down my spine and my body shivered. Something didn't feel right.

I poured myself a cup of joe and tossed in a couple of ice cubes to cool it down. I immediately chugged the contents of the mug and set it down in the sink. I figured Brittany needed sleep, so I didn't bother with a cup for her.

I walked into my room and felt another chill. Was there a draft in my apartment? I decided to check on Brittany and tapped lightly on the door.

"Brittany? Do you need anything?" There was no response. Maybe she fell asleep. I started pacing around my room, not quite sure what to do next.

She probably wants her privacy and doesn't want me just barging in on her. Then again, something feels like it's wrong. I should just check on her.

I walked over to the door and knocked louder this time. Still no response. I turned the handle and slowly opened the creaky door.

"Brittany, are you okay?" I asked at the same time I realized that it was not actually okay.

"Ay dios," I choked out.

The entire bathroom felt like it was on fire and the mirror was completely fogged. Brittany's skin was such a deep color of red that it was practically purple. I knew exactly what was going on. This was all too familiar.

I rushed over to her, turned the faucet on to the ice cold setting, and immediately flipped the switch to drain the boiling hot water. I grabbed the largest, fluffiest towel that I owned and looked over to see Brittany staring through me. She was completely lost.

"Brittany," I had to say fairly loud over the sputtering of the spout. "Please don't do this. Come on, you don't deserve this. Ven conmigo. You can sleep in my really comfy bed." I gave her a genuine smile and held open the towel. "Please?"

She slightly shook her head as if she physically had to shake out her thoughts. Then the beautiful blonde looked me in the eyes with the saddest expression I had ever seen. Suddenly she was very aware of the reality of the situation and stood up quickly.

I instantly wrapped her in the towel and hugged her at the same time. "It's okay," I whispered. "I've got you...I've got you."

Her body was tensed up and her shoulders were raised up so high that I had to stand on my tippy toes to continue hugging her. I rubbed her back soothingly for a few moments and she began relaxing.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't... be here," she stammered out as she released from my hold and gathered her clothes. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess. I'm not your responsibility." She wiped a tear from her cheek and looked at me directly.

"Thank you so much for what you've done for me tonight. You have no idea how much you've helped me." She began to sloppily put her clothes on and I turned away to give her some privacy.

"Brittany, you can't just leave like this. I don't want you to go if you're in danger and especially if you could be a danger to yourself."

"You don't know anything about me!" she spat.

She was right. I thought she was just a nice, sweet girl who ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time. Maybe I crossed the line with my assumptions.

"I'm sorry, Brittany. You're right. I don't know you, but this?" I pointed to the bath tub and then grabbed a hold of her skin harshly. "This I know about."

We made understanding eye contact and I let go of her arm as she grimaced. I turned on my heel and went to the fire escape. I shakily took out a cigarette and lit it after a few unsuccessful attempts due to the wind. Caffeine and cigarettes were always an interesting combination. After several drags I heard my window open. I looked over to see Brittany crawling through the tiny opening.

Even though the steps were extremely narrow, she decided to sit right next to me on one. I offered her a cigarette with a gesture of my hand and held one up. She obliged with a nod and I lit the end for her as she inhaled. We were already very good at reading each other's body language.

"Listen, I'm really sorry Santana. My life is a mess right now and I really fucked up. I made some really bad decisions and wound up in a pretty tight spot. I'm not sure what to do or where to go. I'm really scared and I took all of my emotion out on you. I hope you can forgive me," she finished with a sniffle.

How could I stay mad at this girl? She was such a beautiful disaster.

"Brittany. It's okay. I don't expect you to open up about this tonight if you don't want to. I just want you to be safe. You're still welcome to stay here if you'd like to. You can sleep in my bed and I'll take the couch. No big deal."

"Thank you," she said as she breathed out a puff of smoke.


	3. 21 Questions

**Chapter 3**

**21 Questions**

I woke up to a loud screeching sound and had to take a moment to gather my thoughts. Why was I on the couch? What time was it? Suddenly the flashbacks of last night came flooding into my mind. Brittany.

I tossed the soft blanket onto the back of the couch and slowly rose, cracking every bone in my body. I shuffled over to my room to check on her but I had this empty, sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. When I got to my room, I realized why. She was gone. Nowhere to be found. That's when I realized the sound that woke me up this morning was the sound of her leaving. I quickly ran to the door and slid it open. I sprinted down the several flights of stairs and barged through the front door. I spun all around looking for her but she was long gone.

I sluggishly walked back up to the stairs and into my apartment and was greeted by Rachel, standing in the middle of the living room with her head cocked to the side.

"Hey Rachel," I simply said.

"Well hey to you too. Did you sleep on the couch last night? And I heard some commotion at two in the morning. What was going on? Was someone else here?" she jumbled out.

"Woah, woah, woah. What's with the 21 questions? I put my hands up in front of me as a sign of retreat. I really didn't want to be barraged with her questions first thing in the morning.

"I'm sorry but something weird happened and I need the deets." She crossed her arms and stared me down. It reminded me of the fat cat that my cousins had while growing up. The orange tabby would challenge me to staring contests frequently. I usually lost because it gave me the creeps. I knew the cat thought this meant he was the dominant one.

I opened my mouth to try to get out of this verbal privacy breach but I knew it was useless. Her eyes widened and mine glanced at the floor as I threw my hands up in defeat. She won.

"I... I don't know. I'm still processing it. You're not going to believe me when I tell you," I stated.

"Oh, this is going to be good, I can tell. We better sit down." She walked over and sat on the couch.

I remained standing with my mouth wide open. "Rachel! I cannot believe you are about get off on the drama TV show that is my life right now!" I exclaimed.

"What? Can you blame me? You're the one that didn't want to pay for cable and now none of us can have it. This." She wagged her winger at me. "Is all I've got, sister."

I shook my head at her comically and joined her on the couch. "You're really something else, Berry."

"I'm not sure what that means so I will take it as a compliment." She looked at me more seriously this time. "But honestly, what's going on? You do look kind of freaked out."

"Um, like I said, I'm still processing it. It kind of feels like it's possible it could have even been a dream. Yeah, that must be it." Maybe I slept walked over to this couch and it really was all just a dream.

"Santana? It sounded like there really was a lot of ruckus last night. I don't think you were dreaming it." She was looking more and more concerned by the minute.

"I could have been sleep acting. Which is great because it'll prepare me for me next role!" I wasn't sure who I was trying to convince more. Her or me.

"Santana."

"There's no way it could have happened. I mean, basically I went out to get cigarettes and ended up saving this blonde girl's life from a couple of men in an alley. She was really freaked out so I brought her back here and patched her up. When I woke up she was gone."

"Wait a second. You, Santana, took on two guys and won? What did you do?"

"I put my R.A.D training to good use. The pepper spray helped. It was actually kind of bad ass." I smirked thinking about how I was a knightress in shining armor.

"Well it may be possible it was a dream. Either way, that sounds intense. Was she okay?"

"Hey, I take offense to that. I am very capable of defending myself." I paused for a moment to remember the way she looked and how terrified she felt. I suddenly felt it myself and it shook me to the core. I looked back at Rachel and said "No, she wasn't okay. I can't believe she left. I could have helped her." I took another moment to now remember her beauty and smiled ever so slightly.

"Santana, do you like this girl?" Why was Berry so good at reading my body language?

I looked at the ground again. "Yeah, I think I do. I just have an overwhelming sense of protectiveness for her and now I have no idea where she is. She didn't want me to call the cops or involve any one else. She has a story and I want to help her." I put my hands over my eyes. "But I don't know where she is. I didn't get a phone number, only her first name. Brittany. She was blonde, tall, and beautiful."

"Oh, Santana. You've got it bad. Real bad. Well, who knows, maybe she lives around here and you'll cross paths again one day," she offered.

"I hope so," I shrugged.


End file.
